I wanted to pass along this sad sad story of my life to you.
So, for the past month or so I’ve been taking my dog on runs. This may be shocking for you to believe, but it’s true. I should qualify that my runs mainly involve me running (more like quick walking) for a block and then walking 5 blocks until my heart rate comes down from the near fatal levels. I hate running, but the weather has been great and it helps Bogie release some of his energy.
Anyway back to the story. So today I went on my run. I wasn’t in much of a mood to run. I thought I would cut it shorter and walk most of it. Since I’m doing laundry I decided to wear my old Nike sports bra. Normally I have a super intense sports bra that could be confused for a medieval fortress. On my run, I’m actually feeling pretty good. I have a better stride than normal, and I feel like I’m running more than walking. I’m down Mass Ave, where I see one of my good friends driving by. I happily wave, excited that someone can testify that I was out running. I run into a guy I used to work with and we chat for a bit. Things are going great and I’m feeling really confident. Then, I turn into this alley area to head back home and I look down.
There, I realize that during my run, my boobs have jiggled out of my bra.
Go ahead and reread that line…
My boobs are less than halfway in my bra and it’s very obvious. They just worked their way right on out of that bra, and managed to be around my belly button but still pressed down on the top by the bra so it just looks bizarre. I can’t even describe what it looks like at all. It’s just that off putting.
I decided to walk to the rest of the way home.
This confirms that my body was not intended for any sort of physical exertion.
I hope this helps you all realize that no matter what happened in your day today, your boobs didn’t work their way out of their bra in public.
I think you write/live like the American version of Bridget Jones
Bess, this is Cyndy on your mom’s laptop. Twice, Bess.
First time. I was a junior on spring break in Ft.Lauderdale. With the fam. I got caught in the undertow. I walked toward my parents in my bright melon two piece. My mom kept waving as I walked toward them. I smiled and waved back. She stood up and waved…Hmm. Then when I was close enough to hear her, I looked down. My top got caught in the undertow, too. One boob out, one boob in and several very cute college guys applauding me as I buried my face in the towel!
Second time. Went to Galyans to get a sports bra to wear in my first mini marathon with your aunts. Tried it on but didn’t walk with it on. When Kim, Bethie, and I crossed the finish line I didn’t even consider buying my photo. Both boobs had found the center of the sports bra and I felt like Cyclops needed to be etched on by forehead.